breaking the hush

I was sharing my story with a guy in county last month and he with me. We were talking about our addictions, and he told me something that hit home. He said that wanted to quit drugs, but the simple fact that it didn’t end on his terms, scared him that he would go back. It’s like he knew that he would, that there was more to try before quitting! This resounded in my Spirit. Besides the effects of our addictions, I realized that we had something else in common. I know that II Timot...

One of the first letters written to me while in county jail was from a friend that has been delivered from a drug addiction, who spent time herself incarcerated. I will never forget something that she wrote to me in that first letter. She told me about her being filled with the Spirit while washing dishes, as a trustee. Then she said, “Isn’t it funny…all everyone wants is to get out of there and Jesus just wanted in.” I think about that almost every...

You know, I’ve gotten to experience a lot of things over the past week and a half that I haven’t had in seven months. When in a county jail, you basically stay in one room 24/7. In the one I was in, even the recreation room was directly connected to the dorm, so there was no movement outside. When going to court, there was a tunnel connecting the jail to the courthouse that we walked through, still depriving us of the sun and fresh air. It wasn’t until I left ...

I always love my mom’s birthday! I think it’s because I’m a giver and no matter what I give her, she acts like it was a million dollars! She acts like it was the one thing she wanted that she has been waiting for her entire life! Though, usually, it consists of a treat basket of her favorites – last year it was a bag of twizzlers, black olives, marshmallow cream, candy corn, and diet cokes all put in a plant potter she has been wanting to match the livin...

This past week I have been feeling really “Blah” and a little overwhelmed with my circumstances and incredibly tired of jail. The same everything for over 6 months-room, people, food, routine! I needed something different, something to keep me growing. Chapel service in this county jail is all done through a satellite room located in our tank. Basically, the chaplain holds a service downstairs for the ladies or trustees and it is fed live to that room though a monit...

Sometimes I wish I was more of a reader in order to have a better vocabulary, or even if I was bilingual and spoke words that were richer or sweeter than the English language, then I might be able to express my true feelings for all of you – those friends, family, and even strangers that read and comment on this site. You have no idea how God is not only using this site for others, but as well to encourage me through your words. I would love to address each of you, and ma...

I’m obviously starting a new chapter in my life, only to finalize the last one, by having everything I own moved out of my apartment this past weekend. (A special shout out to Uncle Ronny, Robert (Happy Birthday), Trevor, Tracy, Andrea and mom for making this happen without a hitch! And of course, Dad, the chief! Thank you for your sacrificial time and energy!)

Most people would probably be saddened to have made your house a home, leaving one ...

There’s a saying in here, “You’re not doing this alone, your people are doing it right along with you.” ‘Your people’ being those that love and care for you, close friends and family. You know it really puts things into perspective. Here I am, getting to sleep in everyday, write my little heart out, read, eat, and go back to sleep! No worries! When I have a sister out that that created, and keeps up this website, just packed and cleaned every...

You know, I wasn’t going to blog today because I didn’t want to bring attention to my birthday. I usually don’t tell people because I don’t want it to be a big deal-don’t get me wrong, I love parties, but the problem comes when they party’s focus is on me. I think that there is such overwhelming gratitude in my heart that I don’t ever feel like I could know how to express it. (I don’t want it to seem canned or insincere.) Or I never thought my l...

I was praying last night, more specifically, for my mom. Several times, I have thought that this may be harder on her emotionally than even myself! It could be because I’m her baby, and for any mothers out there, you may get it, or maybe it’s just because I’m a man and she’s a woman-you know, more emotional. For whatever reason, it just is! There have been two conversations that I have recently had with her that stick out to me. The first was that she wanted credit for...